Tag: Culture

Hope in madness.

I don’t know what I’m more astonished at: the absolute madness, unexplainable through visual aspects, of the chaos and sheer hope in my mind daily, or the fact that a man rose from the dead. Literally. Not subjectively, but true. God is real. To me, it’s about as unreal as the moon being hot. I don’t understand what I do. The things I want to do, I don’t do. The things I don’t want to do, I do. The mind is WAR… I haven’t done a personal entry in a while.

I can’t really recall all of the last few months. It’s been very good, and very bad. More so, I think the better word is stability now. Or not. But then I get stricken with fear, wondering if once I say that, it’ll just be more chaos and turmoil.

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THE CHRONICLES Book Seven The Lifeless deconstructed Preacher

XV. Depart From Me
The Devil was done remembering. He was back in the garage, in the present, in
the blue glow of three monitors and a ring light, and he was well pleased.
The man was still there, still alive, still working. On the left screen, a new video
was rendering: “Five Bible Verses Your Pastor Hopes You Never Read.” It would
go up at seven the next morning, when engagement was highest.
The Devil went to the shelf on the far wall of the studio. There, wedged between
a ring of cables and a box of unsold merch, was an old Bible with a leather cover
that had once been black and was now gray at the edges. It had the man’s name
stamped on the front in gold. His parents had given it to him the day he was
baptized. Nobody had opened it in years.
The Devil, who cannot touch holy things with comfort, opened it anyway. It hurt
him. He did not care. He turned to Matthew, the seventh chapter, and found the
verse he knew too well.
Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name?
and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful
works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye
that work iniquity.
He read it twice. And then he laughed, a real laugh this time, loud in the empty
garage, at the part about casting out devils.
“Cast out devils,” he said. “This one? This fool? This tool of mine? He could not
even cast out the weakest of my servants. I had to make it play dead for him.”
He closed the book.

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Modern Myths story one – KYRANOS AND THE SILENT HERALD

Every god in these pages is invented. None of them was ever worshipped, and none of them is real. Their names are built from Greek words, and their shapes are borrowed from the old myths, but they are fabrications, and they are meant to be read as fabrications. Each story is short and stands alone. There is no map to learn and no lineage to memorize. A god appears, a mortal comes before him, and something is given or taken or weighed. Then the story ends, as the old myths ended, without apology.

After each story there is a case study. The myth is the question; the case study is the answer. There the fiction is set down beside the Scriptures, and it is shown what the story was pointing at all along.

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No answers received nor I can give

I can reach for any vanity; gaming, music, content creation, reading, writing, and concerning prayer and spiritual matters it’s these times I have no unction nor desire to pray to God or read words that are to me cold orthodoxy and utterly insufferable.
God forbid you have access to Him and His Word and what do you get? Darkness, despair and incurable emotional and mental pain along with mental crucifixion.
The True God of the universe if I wasn’t such a coward and the fear of damnation I would utterly off myself I would make it to where the body couldn’t be found so there’s no ashes and further money wasted for any burial and my request would have no open wake because me probably being in hell would probably rage all the more that now I’m “missed” when on my time alive here on earth I couldn’t understand why anyone in the absolute hell would want me here.
I’m not worth loving nor do I understand it and my core being is the object of such affront and sin to creation itself that devils laugh when I’m awake and angels mourn.
Yea such is the case in my reasoning.

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Out of the Temple of Aphrodite: Corinthian Shame Culture, Ancient Idolatry, and the Modern Debased Mind

To understand the weight of Paul’s words to the Corinthian church, you have to understand what Corinth actually was. This was not an ordinary Greco-Roman city with an ordinary amount of vice. Corinth had a reputation across the entire ancient Mediterranean world — the Greek verb korinthiazomai, “to Corinthianize,” literally meant to fornicate, to live debauched. That’s not a modern reading imposed backward onto the text; that’s a word that existed in the common vocabulary of the ancient world before Paul ever set foot there. Aristophanes used it centuries earlier. A city had become synonymous with sexual excess so thoroughly that its name turned into a verb for it.

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Resentment

(Entry from yesterday.) If there was no hell I’d blow myself up, along with nobody with me. The only casualty is me and it’s not actually a casualty just a liability that’s been severed from this earth. If my experience with God is such so I don’t want heaven with him im not worthy in the first place and the thought of hell I can’t bear the work. Just let me die already

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Mockery of the disabled {rage} [tears] and standing up for the afflicted

There was a case I remember — this woman who had multiple different ailments, and people would shun her for her appearance. She’s actually a well-known speaker, and I think she has books published, but people called her the ugliest woman alive. And when I heard her story, and heard how she couldn’t find even one comment defending her on the post I couldn’t stop weeping. I couldn’t stop crying. It’s just unthinkable to me. And I yearn for people to be saved. I want anyone with ailments, with all my heart, to be able to look forward to the resurrection. God above with all my soul I say this….

just like Jesus asking Mary about Lazarus, and her saying, “I know I will see him in the resurrection,” and then the Carpenter himself wept — not because he couldn’t raise Lazarus from the dead, but because of the fact that this world, this is the product of what was not meant to be. Death was never part of the plan.

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Contempt for the poor ®

I can’t forget how when I worked at sprouts there was a homeless man outside w/ mental affliction he would walk in circles and we would talk about our similar struggles. Hearing voices and the torment of it and the meds not helping him

I saw people day in and day out entering that store mock that man and gossip about his condition spending insufferable amounts of dollars on groceries. (Some not all by any means.)

The thought struck me that most of these attend church, the Saturday spent mocking this man the next day lifting hands in praise. I wonder on that day how many that held the poor in contempt will lift their eyes in hell the same people they looked down upon now in glory above them with Jesus.

Now asking them for water when they didn’t give a drop or a morsel to them. Sermon after sermon you heard and Christ didn’t dwell in your hearts and you despised the poor man that was far from any religion you thought you would never make it and wrote off. But now how the tables have turned.

Their condemnation is just.

**Ezekiel 8:18 (ESV)**

“Therefore I will act in wrath. My eye will not spare, nor will I have pity. And though they cry in my ears with a loud voice, I will not hear them.”

**Luke 16:24 (ESV)**

“And he called out, ‘Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the end of his finger in water and cool my tongue, for I am in anguish in this flame.'”

**Matthew 25:42–43 (ESV)**

“For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.”

**James 2:3 (ESV)**

“and if you pay attention to the one who wears the fine clothing and say, ‘You sit here in a good place,’ while you say to the poor man, ‘You stand over there,’ or, ‘Sit down at my feet,'”

**Proverbs 17:5 (ESV)**

“Whoever mocks the poor insults his Maker; he who is glad at calamity will not go unpunished.”

I wonder on that day if those people will see that man from sprouts and remember.

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