THE CHRONICLES Book Eight – the man who sought to disprove God

‘The resurrection is his favorite target,” Resha said. “He says the accounts contradict, so it cannot be history. He says the earliest gospel ends with the women running away afraid and no risen Christ at all, and everything after was added by the church to sell the story. He says it in fifty-five seconds with a cut every three seconds and music underneath, and they believe himạỊạ
“He talks about church history too,” Rimmah said. “The crusades. The inquisitions. The witch trials. Every pastor who was ever caught with his hand in the offering plate or worse. He does a whole series called Receipts. He puts the date on the screen and the name of the scandal and says, This is your church. This is what your God’s people do.i
“Some of it is true,” the Devil said.
“Some of it is true,” Resha agreed. “That is the beauty of it. We do not have to invent much. They have given us plenty. We only have to make sure he presents it as though it were the whole story, and as though the Carpenter were the one holding the torch at every burning.”

Epistles to America Letter #1 concerning greed

(These letters are not inspired scripture or added to the canon of the Bible, and if anybody does add to it or take away, let him be accursed.)

The First Epistle
Concerning Gain
A servant of Jesus Christ, a sojourner and a stranger, an evangelist by the will of God and
by the laying on of no famous hands, unto the saints scattered throughout America, in the
great assemblies and in the small, in the arenas and in the rented schoolrooms, in the cities
and in the towns whose names no one remembers: grace be unto you, and peace from God
our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ, of whom it is written, though he was rich, yet
for your sakes he became poor, that ye through his poverty might be rich (2 Corinthians
8:9).
I thank my God upon every remembrance of you. I have sat in your pews and eaten at your
potlucks, and I have seen grace among you that the world does not see. I have seen the
widow fold her envelope small so that no one would know the size of it, and I said in my
heart, here is the woman who cast in two mites, and the Lord is watching the treasury still
(Mark 12:41–44). I have seen men pay for a stranger’s groceries and tell no one, and
deacons fix a single mother’s car on a Saturday and refuse her money, so that their left hand
did not know what their right hand was doing (Matthew 6:3). These things are not forgotten.
For God is not unrighteous to forget your work and labour of love (Hebrews 6:10).

THE CHRONICLES Book Seven The Lifeless deconstructed Preacher

XV. Depart From Me
The Devil was done remembering. He was back in the garage, in the present, in
the blue glow of three monitors and a ring light, and he was well pleased.
The man was still there, still alive, still working. On the left screen, a new video
was rendering: “Five Bible Verses Your Pastor Hopes You Never Read.” It would
go up at seven the next morning, when engagement was highest.
The Devil went to the shelf on the far wall of the studio. There, wedged between
a ring of cables and a box of unsold merch, was an old Bible with a leather cover
that had once been black and was now gray at the edges. It had the man’s name
stamped on the front in gold. His parents had given it to him the day he was
baptized. Nobody had opened it in years.
The Devil, who cannot touch holy things with comfort, opened it anyway. It hurt
him. He did not care. He turned to Matthew, the seventh chapter, and found the
verse he knew too well.
Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name?
and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful
works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye
that work iniquity.
He read it twice. And then he laughed, a real laugh this time, loud in the empty
garage, at the part about casting out devils.
“Cast out devils,” he said. “This one? This fool? This tool of mine? He could not
even cast out the weakest of my servants. I had to make it play dead for him.”
He closed the book.

Modern Myths story one – KYRANOS AND THE SILENT HERALD

Every god in these pages is invented. None of them was ever worshipped, and none of them is real. Their names are built from Greek words, and their shapes are borrowed from the old myths, but they are fabrications, and they are meant to be read as fabrications. Each story is short and stands alone. There is no map to learn and no lineage to memorize. A god appears, a mortal comes before him, and something is given or taken or weighed. Then the story ends, as the old myths ended, without apology.

After each story there is a case study. The myth is the question; the case study is the answer. There the fiction is set down beside the Scriptures, and it is shown what the story was pointing at all along.

No answers received nor I can give

I can reach for any vanity; gaming, music, content creation, reading, writing, and concerning prayer and spiritual matters it’s these times I have no unction nor desire to pray to God or read words that are to me cold orthodoxy and utterly insufferable.
God forbid you have access to Him and His Word and what do you get? Darkness, despair and incurable emotional and mental pain along with mental crucifixion.
The True God of the universe if I wasn’t such a coward and the fear of damnation I would utterly off myself I would make it to where the body couldn’t be found so there’s no ashes and further money wasted for any burial and my request would have no open wake because me probably being in hell would probably rage all the more that now I’m “missed” when on my time alive here on earth I couldn’t understand why anyone in the absolute hell would want me here.
I’m not worth loving nor do I understand it and my core being is the object of such affront and sin to creation itself that devils laugh when I’m awake and angels mourn.
Yea such is the case in my reasoning.

Out of the Temple of Aphrodite: Corinthian Shame Culture, Ancient Idolatry, and the Modern Debased Mind

To understand the weight of Paul’s words to the Corinthian church, you have to understand what Corinth actually was. This was not an ordinary Greco-Roman city with an ordinary amount of vice. Corinth had a reputation across the entire ancient Mediterranean world — the Greek verb korinthiazomai, “to Corinthianize,” literally meant to fornicate, to live debauched. That’s not a modern reading imposed backward onto the text; that’s a word that existed in the common vocabulary of the ancient world before Paul ever set foot there. Aristophanes used it centuries earlier. A city had become synonymous with sexual excess so thoroughly that its name turned into a verb for it.

Resentment

(Entry from yesterday.) If there was no hell I’d blow myself up, along with nobody with me. The only casualty is me and it’s not actually a casualty just a liability that’s been severed from this earth. If my experience with God is such so I don’t want heaven with him im not worthy in the first place and the thought of hell I can’t bear the work. Just let me die already

Mockery of the disabled {rage} [tears] and standing up for the afflicted

There was a case I remember — this woman who had multiple different ailments, and people would shun her for her appearance. She’s actually a well-known speaker, and I think she has books published, but people called her the ugliest woman alive. And when I heard her story, and heard how she couldn’t find even one comment defending her on the post I couldn’t stop weeping. I couldn’t stop crying. It’s just unthinkable to me. And I yearn for people to be saved. I want anyone with ailments, with all my heart, to be able to look forward to the resurrection. God above with all my soul I say this….

just like Jesus asking Mary about Lazarus, and her saying, “I know I will see him in the resurrection,” and then the Carpenter himself wept — not because he couldn’t raise Lazarus from the dead, but because of the fact that this world, this is the product of what was not meant to be. Death was never part of the plan.

Untitled lament

Two things I seek; death or to be healed from this mental torture.

UTTER DREAD.

If You Extract the Precious from the Worthless

1. Jeremiah 15:15–21 is the second of five raw “Confessions” — the most unguarded prayers in the prophetic corpus, complaint (vv. 15–18) followed by God’s answer (vv. 19–21).
2. Verse 18’s “deceitful brook” accusation is severe and direct — Jeremiah tells God to his face that God has failed to deliver, using the ancient Near Eastern image of a dry streambed that betrayed a traveler’s trust.
3. Jeremiah 20:7’s “you have deceived me” is even stronger — the Hebrew patah carries overtones of seduction/coercion, among the most severe accusatory language addressed to God anywhere in scripture.
4. God’s response contains no counter-accusation and no rebuke of the accusation itself — restoration and recommissioning follow immediately, on the same terms as the original call.
5. “Precious” (v.16’s message) versus “worthless” (v.18’s despair) is a distinction between two things Jeremiah can utter, not a verdict that his pain was illegitimate.
6. Restoration in v.19 is not contingent on retracting the accusation — shuv (return) is reorientation, not an apology God withholds mercy for.
7. Anger at God is empirically common, not a marker of abnormal faith — Exline and Pargament’s research finds a majority of adults report having experienced it.
8. Protest toward God (addressed, argued, spoken) predicts better outcomes than silent, unaddressed anger — this is the clinical shadow of exactly what Jeremiah does in this text.
9. Divine struggle intensifies when suffering is tied to core identity rather than external circumstance — which is precisely the terrain a psychiatric condition of the mind itself occupies.
10. Blasphemous obsessions are a documented OCD subtype, and their egodystonic horror is evidence against, not for, actual unbelief.
11. Neither illness nor theology gets full explanatory custody — the mechanism can intensify the expression without the underlying pain being noise.
12. “Wondering why he didn’t destroy me” is the disorientation of a ledger expecting collection that mercy declines to make — Romans 2:4, Psalm 103:10.
13. This document holds prophetic office and vocational calling as distinct — the pattern transfers; the office does not.
14. “Uttering the precious” doesn’t require the protest to have ended first — Jeremiah’s rawest complaint (ch. 20) comes after this one, not before it.