Around 3AM a year and a half ago alone desolate and forsaken by God in my mind. Had been hard to edit recalling how awful these moments were there are prob spell errors so be it. the promises of God in this night were dead to me just like mice gorging on my imagined lifeless corpse utterly dead and the soul in hell and the body totally rotten.
Read More A terrifying night of a woven fabric of afflictionA Strong Word Before We Begin If you have ever walked away from a conversation about God feeling out-argued, embarrassed, or quietly afraid that the “smart people” have figured something out that leaves your faith looking naïve—this piece is for you. The aim here is not to help you win arguments or consign anyone to […]
Read More Where is the debater of this age? God has made foolish the wisdom of this world.The opening narration of the series, spoken by Alphonse Elric, codifies this in language that has become iconic: “Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy’s first law of Equivalent Exchange. In those days, we really believed that to be the world’s one, and only truth.”
Read More THE LAW OF EQUIVALENT EXCHANGEdoes not become a soldier out of ambition or duty. He becomes a soldier because he has seen something that should not exist doing something that should not be permitted, and he wants it erased from the earth. “I’ll kill them all,” he says. “Every last one.”
Such is the same when I think of my mother on her last days she will will me devoured by death which comes for us all namely due to sin and Lucifer our fall in
The garden death entered the world and such is the object of my rage and tears at the devil in that day not at God it was never meant to be this way. Whenever I recall these things, my family passing away or possible friends there is no comfort and I’m beside myself
Read More I hate them with upmost hatred God don’t spare a single one of them.I heard a very powerful sermon this morning at a funeral, of a distant family friend. Very spirit-filled, old-school Baptist preaching. What I have yearned to hear for a while now. I couldn’t help but start crying with a couple of things he was saying. He said some hard things concerning sin and how we […]
Read More High stakes I’ll use everything.A document I requested whenever I was having a religious schizophrenic manic episode
Read More divine madness and creative destruction Was having a rather great night last night then woke up to something unexpected. I think of Jonah and how he was so angry at the leaf the sprout up and the sun beam down on him often times on over we are under such affliction. The smallest thing will set us off into […]
Read More Where were you in the confusion?If you’re let to donate to my ministry cashapp $hopeinmadness Met my advisor at college today. A lot of the anxieties I had concerning all of the details — financial aid, classes, et cetera — got cleared up. I attended college around four years ago, before I got the multiple sclerosis diagnosis. But I withdrew, […]
Read More What I want I cannot obtainI went to service earlier today. During church, I get more so filled — talking to God’s people, God using them to speak through them. Concerning worship, I feel nothing. Concerning sermons, here and there I’ll get a word that I need to hear. It’s just that I wish there were more sermons about sorrow […]
Read More The root of bitternessA Hope in Madness document — using an anime life as a lens on masked suffering, betrayal, and the gentleness of Christ toward the wounded conscience. Adolf Reinhard of Terra Formars is a man of extraordinary gentleness hidden behind a scarred, frightening exterior — a husband who kept loving a wife who betrayed him and […]
Read More The sorrow and rage of adolf Reinhard