Deconstruction is tragedy often paved the way by false ministers and religious hypocrites who are not of Christ. I follow The Carpenter but I still wrestle with these things.
Read More Christian Deconstruction when people denounce their faith because of religious traumaThis entry was from a few weeks ago I’m in a better place mentally now thank God. I was able to go see the brethren in the church for a short time. Hearing a message on the fall of Saul was a timely reminder of what pride can do to a man. I wrestle with […]
Read More SAULS RISE AND FALLSpiraled out last night now I’m here.
Read More A living contradiction the cycling of madnessMy first blog post was explaining what the purpose of this blog is and what madness was namely Scrupulosity also in more ancient times called in Religious Melancholy and in more modern medical clinical terms: “Religious OCD” Concerning my blog: however I’ve learned more since then and wanted to expound more on this and post […]
Read More What Is Madness/Religious OCD (Updated)Truly I tell you I want to give it all to Christ and His Kingdom, I grind my teeth and try so hard. I don’t want intellectual knowledge of the gospel but to have companionship with Christ. I don’t know what to do, I know my life isn’t my own and anything I’ve been given […]
Read More PowerLast night and today is where my soul feels vacant, Christs seems to be distant yet His Word says He’s always near. I mourn over the fact that I seem to have all the right things to say yet there’s apart of me that struggles to believe it myself and I’m left feeling like a […]
Read More Close To Me Far From Me“So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, […]
Read More Better Weak Than StrongI find myself humiliated before The Lord continually in my many wanderings. A video popped up on my feed, it was of one of my favorite preachers answering people’s questions they submitted. The question was: “Why did The Lord put us on this earth to go to hell?” The preacher explained how this isn’t a […]
Read More HumilityIt only gets worse, I’m not done with Christ but I’m done with me. I think I’m improving and then another trial comes with despair of salvation. Feeling condemned because I don’t want to open up the Bible, so vanity and worldly things full my mind. If I read or not I feel condemned either […]
Read More Fearful of Death & Loathing LifeIt’s been nice to have energy at last, I feel like a human again, the medication to help with fatigue from MS has helped tremendously. Since I could remember I’ve been fearful of rejection and disappointing others, it’s no suprise that when I got saved I was continually fearful of God. Afraid that in His […]
Read More Relational OCD & Despair
MY STORY OF RELIGIOUS OCD 