Hope in madness.

I don’t know what I’m more astonished at: the absolute madness, unexplainable through visual aspects, of the chaos and sheer hope in my mind daily, or the fact that a man rose from the dead. Literally. Not subjectively, but true. God is real. To me, it’s about as unreal as the moon being hot. I don’t understand what I do. The things I want to do, I don’t do. The things I don’t want to do, I do. The mind is WAR… I haven’t done a personal entry in a while.

I can’t really recall all of the last few months. It’s been very good, and very bad. More so, I think the better word is stability now. Or not. But then I get stricken with fear, wondering if once I say that, it’ll just be more chaos and turmoil.

THE CHRONICLES Book Eight – the man who sought to disprove God

‘The resurrection is his favorite target,” Resha said. “He says the accounts contradict, so it cannot be history. He says the earliest gospel ends with the women running away afraid and no risen Christ at all, and everything after was added by the church to sell the story. He says it in fifty-five seconds with a cut every three seconds and music underneath, and they believe himạỊạ
“He talks about church history too,” Rimmah said. “The crusades. The inquisitions. The witch trials. Every pastor who was ever caught with his hand in the offering plate or worse. He does a whole series called Receipts. He puts the date on the screen and the name of the scandal and says, This is your church. This is what your God’s people do.i
“Some of it is true,” the Devil said.
“Some of it is true,” Resha agreed. “That is the beauty of it. We do not have to invent much. They have given us plenty. We only have to make sure he presents it as though it were the whole story, and as though the Carpenter were the one holding the torch at every burning.”

Epistles to America letter #2 a call of justice for the abused

A Call to Justice
This letter concerns the abuse of a minor by a minister of the church, and the silencing of those he harmed. It names no church and no person. It is not Scripture, not prophecy, and adds nothing to the Word of God. Resources for reporting abuse are listed at the end.
A servant of Jesus Christ, and a sojourner, to the church that still sits under a man who should not stand before it; and to that man, a deacon and a worker among the youth, caught in transgressions and still unrepentant; and first of all, to every soul who has been wounded by a man who wore the robes of religion: the Lord sees you.

Law of equivalent exchange whiteboard idea

Working on a white board presentation for school campus tomorrow Lord-willing….

Epistles to America Letter #1 concerning greed

(These letters are not inspired scripture or added to the canon of the Bible, and if anybody does add to it or take away, let him be accursed.)

The First Epistle
Concerning Gain
A servant of Jesus Christ, a sojourner and a stranger, an evangelist by the will of God and
by the laying on of no famous hands, unto the saints scattered throughout America, in the
great assemblies and in the small, in the arenas and in the rented schoolrooms, in the cities
and in the towns whose names no one remembers: grace be unto you, and peace from God
our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ, of whom it is written, though he was rich, yet
for your sakes he became poor, that ye through his poverty might be rich (2 Corinthians
8:9).
I thank my God upon every remembrance of you. I have sat in your pews and eaten at your
potlucks, and I have seen grace among you that the world does not see. I have seen the
widow fold her envelope small so that no one would know the size of it, and I said in my
heart, here is the woman who cast in two mites, and the Lord is watching the treasury still
(Mark 12:41–44). I have seen men pay for a stranger’s groceries and tell no one, and
deacons fix a single mother’s car on a Saturday and refuse her money, so that their left hand
did not know what their right hand was doing (Matthew 6:3). These things are not forgotten.
For God is not unrighteous to forget your work and labour of love (Hebrews 6:10).

THE CHRONICLES Book Seven The Lifeless deconstructed Preacher

XV. Depart From Me
The Devil was done remembering. He was back in the garage, in the present, in
the blue glow of three monitors and a ring light, and he was well pleased.
The man was still there, still alive, still working. On the left screen, a new video
was rendering: “Five Bible Verses Your Pastor Hopes You Never Read.” It would
go up at seven the next morning, when engagement was highest.
The Devil went to the shelf on the far wall of the studio. There, wedged between
a ring of cables and a box of unsold merch, was an old Bible with a leather cover
that had once been black and was now gray at the edges. It had the man’s name
stamped on the front in gold. His parents had given it to him the day he was
baptized. Nobody had opened it in years.
The Devil, who cannot touch holy things with comfort, opened it anyway. It hurt
him. He did not care. He turned to Matthew, the seventh chapter, and found the
verse he knew too well.
Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name?
and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful
works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye
that work iniquity.
He read it twice. And then he laughed, a real laugh this time, loud in the empty
garage, at the part about casting out devils.
“Cast out devils,” he said. “This one? This fool? This tool of mine? He could not
even cast out the weakest of my servants. I had to make it play dead for him.”
He closed the book.

Modern Myths story one – KYRANOS AND THE SILENT HERALD

Every god in these pages is invented. None of them was ever worshipped, and none of them is real. Their names are built from Greek words, and their shapes are borrowed from the old myths, but they are fabrications, and they are meant to be read as fabrications. Each story is short and stands alone. There is no map to learn and no lineage to memorize. A god appears, a mortal comes before him, and something is given or taken or weighed. Then the story ends, as the old myths ended, without apology.

After each story there is a case study. The myth is the question; the case study is the answer. There the fiction is set down beside the Scriptures, and it is shown what the story was pointing at all along.

No answers received nor I can give

I can reach for any vanity; gaming, music, content creation, reading, writing, and concerning prayer and spiritual matters it’s these times I have no unction nor desire to pray to God or read words that are to me cold orthodoxy and utterly insufferable.
God forbid you have access to Him and His Word and what do you get? Darkness, despair and incurable emotional and mental pain along with mental crucifixion.
The True God of the universe if I wasn’t such a coward and the fear of damnation I would utterly off myself I would make it to where the body couldn’t be found so there’s no ashes and further money wasted for any burial and my request would have no open wake because me probably being in hell would probably rage all the more that now I’m “missed” when on my time alive here on earth I couldn’t understand why anyone in the absolute hell would want me here.
I’m not worth loving nor do I understand it and my core being is the object of such affront and sin to creation itself that devils laugh when I’m awake and angels mourn.
Yea such is the case in my reasoning.

Out of the Temple of Aphrodite: Corinthian Shame Culture, Ancient Idolatry, and the Modern Debased Mind

To understand the weight of Paul’s words to the Corinthian church, you have to understand what Corinth actually was. This was not an ordinary Greco-Roman city with an ordinary amount of vice. Corinth had a reputation across the entire ancient Mediterranean world — the Greek verb korinthiazomai, “to Corinthianize,” literally meant to fornicate, to live debauched. That’s not a modern reading imposed backward onto the text; that’s a word that existed in the common vocabulary of the ancient world before Paul ever set foot there. Aristophanes used it centuries earlier. A city had become synonymous with sexual excess so thoroughly that its name turned into a verb for it.

THE CHRONICLES Book SIX The Meditation

A grown man three seats down had both hands on his own head and was shouting a name into the air with an intensity the chronicle has heard directed at almost nothing else in an ordinary week — not at a grave, not at a wedding, not in a hospital corridor at three in the morning. He had never once heard that man make that sound about anything that would matter to him in five years.

And a boy, catching a ball thrown from ninety feet, receiving all of it — nineteen thousand throats at once, arms up, a whole building come to its feet for a man who would not remember any of their faces by morning.

Not one word of it went upward.

“I didn’t have a second chance,” he said, to no one, in the noise, “and I have never once wasted a moment regretting that I don’t. There is nothing in me that grieves the shape of my own sentence. It is what it is and I settled the question of it before your sun was hung.

“But you have one. Every single one of you standing in this building has the one thing I will never again be offered, still open, still available at the hour I am watching you, and you are spending it on a man who cannot dribble a ball into eternity.”